Reminders

On the same day I was issued a search consultation for an infant born on March 2, I stood in the back of the auditorium for the NMDP all-staff meeting, waiting nearly an hour to watch Barb meet her patient.

Barb began her introduction with "tears aren't the problem...it's trying to hold them back that causes pain", as she wiped her eyes with her deceased father's handkerchief, in the company of her husband, twin daughters, mother and parents-in-law. Recently, she was playing a rousing game of Scattergories with her immediate family. Apparently they have the same problem at their house...her husband nearly always wins whatever game they choose to play. That night, for "gifts you give someone" her husband wrote "time." Stopping to debate the legitimacy of the answer, her husband quipped, "Barb, just ask Mitch if he thinks time is a gift."

When Mitch and his wife entered the room, Mitch's wife embraced Barb...and wouldn't let her go. After all, Barb had given them the gift of more time. Mitch subsequently told a story about a night after his chemotherapy when he had dozed off in his chair. He woke to find his wife staring at him with tears in her eyes. He asked her what was wrong and she said, "I love you so much I wish I could take your pain and make it my own."

Every day people like Barb selflessly give of themselves so that complete strangers may have just one more moment, or if they're really fortunate, many more moments with the people they love. Work has been incredibly hectic, but Barb helped remind me yesterday why we work so frantically to find the most suitable donor for patients...to give people just a little more time.